Behind blue eyes

Today we celebrate our son, Mike on the occasion of his 46th birthday.
He was not with us
for so many birthdays
Lost in a world where mom's and
Dads don't go
except in the nightmares
Of their minds when sleep curls up in
a cold corner of the dark room
And they can only stare silently at the
Ceiling, while the whirring fan seems
to mark the months on invisible
calendars.
We joyfully celebrate his love and his gentle spirit
Thankful for his presence across the dinner table
he is in arms reach and but
a heartbeat away.
Happy birthday, sweet child o' mine!

© Nancilynn Saylor
14 December 2017

I heard it snowed today in Denver

I heard it snowed today again in Denver

all the ground looks like a frosty, winter wonderland

Here in Texas it has been another a muggy day

why we aren’t getting rain I can’t quite understand

 

Storm clouds are moving up now from the coastline

they spread and shroud the Monday morning sky

The pressure in the air is heavy as a stone

We’ll  be getting 5 inches later, forecasts say

 

Sometimes I get wistful when I hear about the snowfall

I think back to other springs in several lifetimes past

I see young boys in snowsuits bundled up against the cold

and smile at the brief memories but the visuals don’t last

 

I am glad they got the snow today in Denver

I hope we’ll see the promised rain before the morning light

Today, I’ll celebrate my loved ones 71st birthday

It’s a good enough life Romeo, I wish you peaceful dreams tonight .

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Remains of my day

The rain splattering on the deck

awakened me before the alarms sequentially

started the morning wake up sequence.

Rain! I am hopeful that means fewer

grains of pollen per million as my head

is about to explode.

Traffic crawls.

I crawl with it. The hospital and it’s

normal insanity are not going anywhere…

Crisis follows mayhem; a new year but

nothing new…

The skin is peeling off my face from the past week

of frigid weather…the rain means it is warmer.

The day is gray, the mist penetrates the landscape

and my gloomy psyche.

Last  year, sunshine

on this date; we celebrated daddy’s 90th birthday.

This year he will celebrate in Heaven.

We are family~~~~

January 6, 2013
It has not quite been a week since I returned to my blog…planning to continue writing here weekly for all of 2013. It has so far not proved to be too difficult…not with-standing the pain I have sitting here perched on the edge of a wooden straight-back folding chair in this wreck of a space I call my computer room. It is not the computer that is a wreck but rather the mistress of the room, Moi`. I sit, now, perched because the sciatica that has plagued me for over two years. I finally rounded a corner in regard to the sciatica within the last week; I asked my Physical Medicine Doctor to send my record and referral to a Neuro-guy. By Neuro-guy I mean surgeon because at this point that seems to be the option I have been scudding towards, heels dug-in for the past how many months that turned into years.
I was no more aware of my aching back-butt unit than yesterday when my beloved Romeo and I made a day trip to San Antonio from our home in the center -of-our-Universe, which is South Austin, Texas. The occasion for the trip, was a birthday dinner celebrating my father’s upcoming 90th birthday in 2 days. All but 1 of my sibs live in San Antonio, as does my dad. I knew the trip was coming up and as if instinctively my back began to act up as dawn broke.
No matter how I wriggled around in the car seat my back rewarded me with streaks of pain rushing from back to hip to big toe on the right side of my body. When it was not shooting pain it was a feeling as if ice water was trickling down the leg. I am not normally such a grumpy co-pilot; however, poor Romeo had to endure the spin-off effects of my misery the entire 84.3 miles to the Outback Steakhouse. We were low on gas, my fault for not filling the car after I finished at the nail salon. Just the small act of getting fuel seemed to warrant another explosion from me. Dare I say taking the wrong exit off the freeway launched yet another tirade from her not- driving –the- car. Sigh.
The family had been seated in the restaurant by the time we arrived. Everyone was there…nope, wait, someone was missing. One of my sisters and her husband sent apologies…sick with a cold. I freaking quietly became ballistic, sharing my dissatisfaction with my baby sister who filled me in on the absence. All is good everyone said because she did not want to get our daddy sick…grudgingly, I agreed it was probably just as well-after all, she was a nurse.
We shared appetizers and bread and girl trips to the bathroom together. My dad was very happy to have a majority of the family together. We told jokes, talked about the economy, retirement and bad backs. Some of us mouthed silent messages across the table to each other, and we adjourned back to dad’s to say our goodbyes. No one was hungry for cake since the server and her team brought daddy a small cake and sang a birthday song. It was a good day.
I was much more relaxed on the return trip home. I apologized repeatedly to my love who repeatedly said it was not necessary. My back will hurt until it is fixed…I might as well be as cheerful over top of the pain as possible, because my wonderful Daddy will only turn 90 one time. I was glad to share it with him.